Jared here. I’ll say it again: We just can’t wonder any more. God? Dead. Love? Pheromones. The only remaining mystery is Hannah Montana.

When it’s time to repopulate the world, I’m not taking my chances.

Nick here. I also replaced my sleep with placebo sleep: I think I’m dreaming but I’m really just on a sugar pill. And acid.

Everyone knows about Washington’s false teeth, but few know about his love for David Caruso. Ha ha, a historical figure is being inappropriate!

Of course, since Nick has the Capgras delusion, he thinks all the people he’s only seen once before have been replaced by actors whom he’s never seen again.

Jared here. I really liked that cat, I think. Unless it was a small dog.

I suppose it’s better than the time he told me he’d learned Chinese.

Nick here. My next project is a thousand finger-play fortune tellers. I’m not wishing for anything, I just have a grade school I want to bend to my will. Anyone have a collection of eight thousand hypnotic triggers?

Jared here with a peek at this sketch’s deleted scenes:

“His grave was covered in FLOURS!”
“Gramps died just like my baNANA!”
“The funeral took place on a SUNDAE!”

But last time it was so FUN