August 2008
8 posts
WatchNever get involved in a land war in Latin America either.
WatchJared here. A club mix. With dancing women over it. I’d sue the bastards, but damned if it doesn’t somehow feel truer than my original acoustic version.
WatchJared here. I figured out what a hypothetical pastry expense is, and no I won’t tell you because it’s like Tubgirl to the factor of 2 Girls One Cup times Beverly Hills Chihuahua. Oh god, if I say that does that mean we’re sponsored by them now? I hope not. Unless they pay as much as the price of a fleet of Smart Cars. WHY DID HE GET US FIVE SMART CARS?
WatchHaving shut him up, I resumed the Sudoku. Many fine Sudoku have been completed in a cafe. People like to say Sudoku. Say it with me. Sudoku. Sudoku. Roll it around until it sounds like a sushi roll. Like a fish. I’ll have the Sudoku. One Sudoku Nigiri. It’s not racist, it’s Japanese.
WatchThe strip club does have a buffet, but we figured we shouldn’t tempt fate, since we’d already cheated the odds on hepatitis.
WatchOh look! It is as if Digg itself sponsored this video and not as if we stole a wallpaper image from a DeviantArt site! Are we suggesting that you, precious viewer, submit this video to Digg.com and thereby ruin the show with an influx of irony-deficient webtards? Never! We’d never buy cheap fleeting attention at the expense of our — Jesus Christ, that’s our TOTAL view count?...
WatchI just did MOMA in twenty minutes. Now I’m off to see a Philip Glass concert at 32x speed before my daily session of yoga-in-a-jiffy.
WatchHow callous was my heart before
I met an angel named Lenore
Actually she’s named Shontay
She’s pretty hot stuff either way.